1

Happy Birthday Dai Kow Fu!

My dear brother, I miss you. It’s been ten years. I’ve started telling Nessness about you, her Dai Kow Fu. She knows you’re born in the year of the ox. I think you’d have lots of fun with them. You’d be buying Nessness a lot of dahn-tat (egg tarts), A&W onion rings, and popcorn. You’ll probably have to negotiate with her over the last piece of century egg. And you’d probably be the one to buy her a Star Wars BB8 toy. Obiwan is still little but I can see you trying to make him laugh all the time. Oh and you’d get them Flames gear to balance out all the Oilers stuff their Daddy will get them. 😀

You’d be 32 now. Married maybe? I try not to imagine what your life could’ve been too much. I just wish you were here and that we can celebrate your birthday together. Nessness would probably want to be on your lap as you blow out the candles. Going to have some sushi for you today. And bubble tea.

Much love to you.

0

Your kids are supposed to leave you…

Life of HeArt

…your spouse isn’t.

What’s more common though are parents putting all the attention and energy and focus and devotion on the kids to the neglect of their spouse. And usually there are also some unresolved issues buried in there that made taking care of the kids an excuse to not deal with the issues.

As I caught up with various friends and the topic of family comes up, I realized I’ve heard and witnessed this in the parents of my friends and even in family. It wasn’t apparent before. Maybe because we were young, self absorbed, looking forward to our own shiny, promising future. Even if they fought we probably just rolled out eyes, plug in the ear buds, or close the door in our room. But now that we’ve left the nest or see that the nest is nearly empty, we can see that Mom and Dad seem like strangers to…

View original post 248 more words