Jordan

Jordan River in Israel – Image not mine

I didn’t have any inclination this time as to the sex of the fetus I lost. But to honor the little life who won’t feel hugs and kisses from this family, I wanted to give him/her a name. Even if s/he won’t hear it on this side of Heaven.

After going through pages of unisex names, we would like to introduce Jordan.

Jordan means “to descend” or “flow down” which describes my emotional and spiritual state for the months following my loss. It symbolizes the crossing over one does from death into life as you pass through its waters. I know this one has crossed into life eternal. The crossing over also describes a bit of my journey from a dark place back into the light. And, in a bit of dark humor, it describes how once again, my little one was flushed down a toilet (despite my attempts to preserve everything for science. This was confirmed because the pathology report that came back said they could not find the fetus for examination. 😭😭😭)

Jordan joins his/her sister Hanna and their uncle, my brother, Nathaniel in Heaven. How thankful I am that loss in this life is only farewell.